Colorful Costa Rica

Bougie on a Budget

"I'm not saying I'm bougie, but I'm bougie," Cam said as he ran his fingers through his soft, wet hair - which smelled faintly of coconut and bananas. You see, we hadn't come to Costa Rica for luxe bathrobes and tropical shampoo, we had come seeking adventure. Unfortunately, we also came on a budget; and well, you get what you pay for. Let's rewind a little.

We woke up that morning to pouring rain, followed by a chorus of singing birds the moment the sun peeked out. We ate a hearty bowl of Zucaritas (that's Spanish for Frosted Flakes, apparently), and started our drive from the Arenal Volcano to Monteverde. We were expecting a long drive through winding mountains and rough roads and, knowing this, we set out early - like good, responsible travelers. But what are we, if not easily distracted?

"ZIP LINES AQUI!"

The sign jumped out, as if someone had placed it there just for us. The way we saw it, we had only two options: be boring or book the tour. Before long, we were breathing heavy as we climbed up a very humid, very steep mountain (the sign had not mentioned this part). We soared high above waterfalls and through rainforest trees, and only once did I get stuck hanging in the middle of the line (I'm still so, so ashamed). We willingly clipped our six year old to a stranger and watched them bail off cliffs together, and everyone got a kick out of Shep's enthusiasm and bravery. But, I digress. While this experience was amazing, it is not the point of this story.

Filthy, happy, hungry, and smelling like a small football team, we loaded up the rental and continued our drive.

Arañas

Somewhere in the middle of nowhere, panic ensued when we realized our rental car was CRAWLING WITH TINY SPIDERS. Hundreds of them, probably. Cameron courageously brushed them out with his bare hands while I re-evaluated my life decisions and wondered why we didn't just stay home. Still, we pressed on - making our way around Lake Arenal - through rainy rainforests, and into lush green hillsides. Randomly, we stumbled on a lone Kentucky Fried Chicken, which - as much as I love plantains and black beans - was a welcome reprieve from Casado. Exhausted, and intermittently overwhelmed with creepy crawly sensations, Cameron drove and I drifted off to sleep as dusk settled in around us. I have always trusted him to keep us safe.

He would go on to repeatedly wake me up each time I nodded off because these roads were SKETCH and it was getting dark dark. The fog was thick, and even he was getting nervous.

In the interest of being cheap and adventurous, we booked a remote one-room AirBnb that overlooked a coffee farm for something like $29 a night. What a steal! We never took gap years or stayed in hostels or backpacked across anywhere so this was our time to shine. Even so, the driving directions were unclear and we could not find this place in the deep black of night. After almost committing to just sleeping in the spider car, we finally found a driveway that could have possibly resembled what we were looking for - but who could tell?

The lights are on, so I knock on the door and am greeted by a cautious, young Costa Rican woman.

"Hola. Como estas? Mi nombre es Andrea. Donde estas su Airbnb," I say proudly, rolling my R's and using almost all the Spanish words I know in one sentence.

"We don't have one, keep going half a mile and the drive is on the right." She looked over suspiciously at my 6-foot-1 husband with her beautiful, dark eyes.

A Place to Rest

We finally arrived at our room - exhausted, cranky, and beyond ready to just close our eyes. We carried our bags in, so hopeful that in a few short hours we would wake to views for days and the aroma of the freshest fresh coffee. But as luck would have it, our value bargain Airbnb was on sale for a reason. SPIDERS. SPIDERS EVERYWHERE. Not even all the Fear Factor episodes I watched back in the eighth grade could have prepared me for this.

Now I know what you're thinking - you didn't expect a few bugs in a tropical rainforest? Well no, actually. It had indeed not occurred to me that such a place existed where there could be spiders on the ceiling, in the sheets, on the pillows, and tucked into each and every corner of a one-room rental. Now, even if they had all been of the harmless, poisonless, not-at-all-creepy variety, we shuddered at the thought of crawling into bed while so many creatures crawled in with us. And I could not, in good conscience, lay my child down to sleep at a spider slumber party.

Immediately realizing the gravity of our situation, we google searched nearby hotels and started calling every single one on the list. And my eyes started twitching with each "No vacancy." Just as all hope seemed lost, a tired receptionist promised to keep the lights on another 45 minutes if we thought we could make it in time. You better believe we high-tailed it out of there and didn't look back.

It wasn't long before we threw down our credit card and signed without even looking.

Enter: Banana Shampoo

Little did we know that in our frantic search for a basic room with clean beds, we would end up at a luxury eco-resort with opulent amenities, organic coffee, farm-to-table dining, laundry service, and most importantly, no spiders. This is the kind of place that we would generally never splurge on. The several-hundred-dollars-or-maybe-more-a-night kind of place. To this day, I still don't know how much money we spent here, because I just didn't want the facts to spoil the fun. We spent three days soaking in hot tubs and listening to monkeys and eating banana bread French toast and ordering room service and just generally throwing our budget out the window. I even paid by the piece for housekeeping to launder our undies (#worthit).

And while we left there smelling like tropical luxury and feeling like old money, we also learned a little something about ourselves:

We love a good deal and a good splurge.